Do you know how to
recognice a broken person?
It's the way he looks at you when you say he sucks. The silent
nod of agreement, without any emotion, without questioning
anything.
I have nothing important to say so this entry is just useless ramble.
Have I already told how
much I hate waterbeds? My sister used to have one but then she
got bored of it, moved out and left the bed here. And then I
moved to this room and there was the bed, waiting for me. I've
been sleeping in it for three years and I still don't like it. It's
way too soft, there's a zillion poisonous chemicals you need to
put in it. And it's a waterbed. I've never been a big
fan of water anyway and now I must sleep on it. Of course I could
give up on it but then I'd have to figure out how to empty it,
and how to get it out of my room. I can't remember how we got it
inside but the door's too small and you can't put it to pieces.
about water though. I like rain, as long asa I don't have to be
outside and/or as long as I don't get wet in any way. I dislike
swimming but will do it on special occasions. Say, we're in
France. Unfortunately we haven't been in France since 1998.
I dislike swimming because I tend to sink underwater. It's not
that I can't swim but I somehow just sink lower and lower and get
my nose and mouth and whatever full of water.I think it's the
shape of my body which doesn't make me exactly fit for swimming.
I have too long and too thin body for the water to support. And
anyway, wherenever I do go swimming the water's too cold. I hate
cold and I get cold very easily which is why I've been wearing
three shirts all winter even when I've been inside. It's
different abroad where it's warm. Then there's the shark scare. I've
been scared of sharks as long as I can remember. It's hard for me
to believe something so wide as underwater world wouldn't have
something deadly and dangerous in it.
Of course, I'm basically blind when I swim unless I want to risk
losing my all expencive and annoying glasses, so that doesn't
make it any more comfortable.
Curiously, I feel better when I dive even though I always almost
drown. I just don't like to hang between two realities, I guess.
I've been painting today. I
haven't done that for a while, been too tired to do that, I guess.
I'd like to go and buy new cds but I'd have to send ages in a
train to get to any decent recod shops and I'm not really up to
it.
Anyway.
I think I've gone a bit insane because of the lack of sleep.
-Your obsessions?
- Pretty boys. With each other.
My head is killing me.
Ouch.