21.7.2000

I'm making myself die. Whatever it takes. That's why it's insignificant if I got to uni, that's why it's insignificant whether I want to die or not, whether other people want me to or not.

I'm annoyed. Nothing means anything and I'm sick and tired of people thinking it does. I'm sick and tired of trivial real-life stuff and I'm sick and tired of trying to care.

I'll die. I can't help that and I don't want to help that. I want to die. I hate being alive. And if you want to die too, it's none of my business. So I need to stop whining and being pretentious and acting like I thought it mattered, because it doesn't matter and I know it.

I want to go to bed now.

Back again.