OK, I admit that whining about the Christmas Holidays is a fairly lame thing to do. The cynical commercialism of the occasion makes attacking it about as difficult and sporting as shooting fish in a barrel, and about as interesting to watch. Worse than this, I'm an atheist who hasn't even read the "Wholly Babble", so I'm on shaky ground when commenting on what is, in theory at least, a religious festival.

You've been warned.

Worshipping the Devil

There are those who find Satanic messages concealed in a wide variety of places - recorded backwards in music or on the label of tin of beans or whatever. Christmas Time is heavy with such messages. The first is in the date of festival.

The date isn't that of the actual birthday of Christ; if he existed at all, he appears to have been born in the spring-time. There is some theory that the festival was based on some usurped pagan winter solstice celebrations, however I find this unconvincing because the winter solstice is in fact on December 22, plus or minus about a day. What then is the relevance of December 25th ? Consider the octal (base 8) numbering system and note that 31 Oct = 25 Dec. That is to say, Halloween and Christmas are equivalent. Halloween - that celebration of witches, goblins and all that is regarded as Evil.

For a festival that is apparently about the birth of the founder of religion, there seems to be comparatively little mention of the Christ guy himself. As an exercise, I'd suggest walking around your neighbourhood, or shopping mall, during the holidays and observing the decorations. I'll bet the plastic Santas and other Santa paraphernalia (reindeer, trees and so on) outnumber the Nativity scenes at least 100:1. And I'd guarantee that the guy in the red suit is the foremost, if not sole, character on the mind of your average child. And their long-suffering parents.

I don't think it can be denied that the celebrations have been overwhelmingly usurped by Santaism, yet the only connection I see between the guy in the suit and the Christian religion is in the name "St Nicholas", yet even this name implies a connection with "Old Nick".

But there's a more direct message in the name SANTA itself; it is an anagram of S-A-T-A-N.

If you need any more evidence that Santa is The Antichrist, consider that he is portrayed as a jolly old fat guy who lives in the Arctic: The complete opposite of Christ, who is portrayed as a serious young skinny guy who lived in the desert.

In addition, there's evidence that Santa is a Communist, a pedophile and even a male-chauvinist. Take away his red suit (itself a giveaway) and you'll have to agree that Santa bears a remarkable resemblance to Karl Marx. And the guy's whole purpose in life - the distribution of presents to all without payment - is about as communistic as you can get. Also consider that the christmas carol "Oh Christmas Tree" has exactly the same tune as the Communist anthem "The Red Flag".

As for being a pedophile, you need only consider his antics in shopping malls, let alone his predilection for invading the bedrooms of children at night.

There is perhaps less evidence for male-chauvinism, yet there are some strong indications: The name "Father Christmas" seems to be quite a patriarchal term. Apparently he is married, yet his wife is hardly ever even mentioned and appears entirely house-bound in a dreary Arctic wasteland.

OK, to sum it up: Here in the West, where the Christian religion predominates, the biggest and most important holiday of the year is in fact centred around worshipping Satan, and in particular revelling in his openly communistic and pedophilic actions.

It gets worse

Unfortunately, things aren't that good. I'd find the season bearable - perhaps even enjoyable - if it was about devil-worship and Marxism. But regretfully the Santa people worship is just as mythical as the Christ he has replaced.

Sadly, Christmas Time is as much about Communism and Devil-Worship as it as about "Giving" and "Good-will to Men".

The concept of "Giving" has always seemed to me to be double-speak. Since every gift has a recipient as well as a donor, the mere fact that people exchange gifts isn't evidence that people want to give any more than it is they want to get. I think you would agree that the vast majority of children - at whom the festival is aimed - are more interested in getting rather than giving. The Santa myth reinforces this; since the presence of a benevolent Santa allows one to get without the bother of giving.

The whole idea of giving presents, which must (for some reason) be "surprise" presents, seems to me to be entirely for the benefit of retailers. Presumably the idea is to shift stock of no conceivable worth and that people wouldn't otherwise buy in a fit. The fiction that "it's the thought that counts" allows people to get away with foisting completely useless stuff onto others.

Consider: If I want or need something, I'll generally buy it right away. If I don't, there will be a reason, such as that the item is too expensive or whatever. I don't think I'm unique in this respect. The chance of someone being able to identify something that I want, but don't have, is very slim indeed. If anyone were to purchase me a Christmas present, they would basically have to waste their money on something that was useless to me. They may or may not also have to agonise over their choice first. In any case, I would feel bad that they'd wasted their money.

It's a ridiculous situation in which no one wins, except for those selling the junk.

"Good-will" is also something that appears to be in short supply during the festive season. Go to a department store and watch the people elbowing each other aside in their quest for the latest "must have" trinkets. Listen to the squealing and brawling sprogs. Look at their parents fighting for parking spaces outside.

There appears to be an obligation to "spend time with family". I feel that very few actually enjoy this. For the rest of us, the experience ranges from merely tedious to a horrible ordeal. Everyone is pretending they like it, and at the same time feeling bad that they don't. Office Christmas parties are just as bad - spending yet more time with the bunch of objectionable people you've hated all year.

And there's not even anything good on TV...

In Conclusion

Christmas sucks.

It is lies (Good-will that isn't) layered upon lies (the myth of Santa, who is evil) layered up lies (the myth of Christ, in whose name so many horrors have been perpetrated).

Boycott the festering season !

If you see a young child, explain to them that Santa is the epitome of evil, and anyway doesn't even exist.

Burn those plastic santas or impale them on Christmas trees.

Beat up those pedophiles who infest the shopping malls.

If you see carol singers, follow them around with a ghetto-blaster and drown out their insipid drooling with some Satanic heavy metal.

Tinsel ? - Just Say No.

Last updated: Jan 26th 2002 All death threats to: Grey Knight

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