When....? (part two)
Scribbled down on Friday, 12 August 2005 16:42:40 PM
Can someone tell me when I really do mean something? Am I just angry impersonally? Or angry with myself? Do I mean it when I say I hate something? I don't know. I work completely messed up, like something undirectable. I just go in every direction, I have no clue what I'm doing. I feel so much regret. I feel aweful. I feel like shit. When I feel sorry I get this very sweaty sensation, I feel paralyzed.

I am going to clean my blog, deleting stuff, as that's what cowards do. I'm a chicken over anything and more than anything, I don't like fighting even I have that too often. I prefer to keep everyone as a friend at the same time I hate them, but do I mean that? It doesn't work all the time. No, it doesn't work all the time. I follow a road but I always make exceptions, I always eat fruit with salads, while I told you I'd never eat any vegetables or fruit. What I say today, will never be the same tomorrow. That's terrible, how will I ever define myself this way?

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