this afternoon i spent an hour whoring myself to various corporations in hopes of finding future summer employment in a remote location, as well as garnering several free tshirts which would allow me to put off doing laundry even further.  however, i quickly realized that things would not go my way after a few moments upon arriving in the vaudeville act which are corporate employment fairs.  the first thing i noticed was a disturbing lack of corporate tshirts which were to be handed out.  this was an immediate let down simply because not paying for something as inconsequential and unnecessary as clothing feels wonderful.  the next thing i noticed is that there were an unusually high number of young, attractive women working corporate booths instead of the middle-aged to old, balding, possibly overweight men i am used to having to show my ignorance of the computer-related field to.  needless to say, i avoided all booths with young, attractive women and stuck to the aging males.  not that i felt any more comfortable (in fact, they are probably much harsher on finding out how stupid i am because of their miserable life due to the fact they are aging engineers) around them, but girls or women in general, i am just not good with.  the corporate display arena, while being quite expansive, was like a miniature labyrinth with twisting turns and canals everywhere.  the thermal energy soared inside the arena, with body temperatures rising steadily from applicant stress, corporate interviewer annoyance, and lighted company displays.  it was an oppresive hour of my life to say the least; i don't intend to repeat it at any point during the future. on the way home i saw an attractive girl waiting for a bus.  she had short dark hair, that's all i can remember at this point.  i should have asked her what kind of music she liked, tried to start a conversation, done something.  but, as usual, i walked on by not saying a word, accepting to not be seen, to fade out.  so i fear it will always be. today my catacomb in the sky received a phone call at 12:46 pm.  i was at class during the time, but when i came back, there it was, the little light on the digital and unnecessary answering machine blinking.  whoever decided to call my phone number didn't leave a message, or even the standard quickened hangup and dial ringing.  there was nothing.  ghosts call me apparently.  nevertheless, it felt empowering to have someone call...feelings of power over that person: because i was not here, they had to leave a message.  they left no return information.  i cannot get back to them.