Usually when I have an idea or thought that I think is important, I'm nowhere near a place where I can write that idea down, and after contemplating it and hoping to remember it, I always forget what I was thiking.  Either some other thought occupies it's place, or it is jarred from my mind by an interruption of my thought processes.  During last year at university, I was usually always relatively close to a computer, and thus for the most part what I immediately felt or thought was written down.  However, here at home, I do not have this luxury.  Thoughts have time to process, sound less revolutionary, lose their unique wording and energy they once carried.  This is a bit disappointing because I tend to have interesting philosophies and "deep" ideas when taking a shower, drivign, or attending a boring meeting at work; and these concepts could become word-bytes of knowledge from the modern age, much like a Chuck Palahniuk novel.  Maybe I'll have better luck recording my logic and reasoning and university. This year, I will not be a freshman, but a sophomore instead.  I have a growing distaste already for the incoming freshman class.  I think they will be tourists, mulling about the campus like mindless social drones, each one a clone of some master brainless trendsetter.  Somehow, I doubt any of them will want to use the campus for the purpose or degree like myself.  They want to get drunk and have parties.  I want to have adventures wlaking about the streets at night.  I have and will continue to sit on the steps of an architecurally gorgeous building, pondering complex issues which concern me, or personal dilemmas.  I have this daydream where everywhere I go will be some freshman tourist lounging around, getting in my way of using my time as I see best.  Eventually, I get so annoyed with their behavior, I give up my hpoes and never leave my apartment room again.  I konw those are selfish and hopefully ignorant feelings and daydreams.  After all, I was a freshman along with hundreds of others and never seemed to get in anyone's way.  Then again, I am an odd kid, quite different from the life patterns of everyone else.  I will assume that this year's batch of incoming kids won't be any different or obnoxious than last year's.  Maybe it's for the best if there are no differences.  Maybe not. My sister's ex-boyfriend called and talked to me on the phone for a few minutes today.  I hate the telephone.  Amidst the small, pointless and ultimately discouraging chat, he asked me when my last day of work was.  I already had this conversation with him one week ago, before my sister "dumped" him.  I distinctly remember saying "I leave in two weeks" and him responding "this is my last week at work."  I wonder how some people can't even remember what their limited conversations with me are about.  Is this how all people hear me?  They listen only to forget what I've said in a sea of other words?  I remember precisely what he said.  I suppose my few conversations are already failed to be forgotten once I open my mouth anyway.  After all, I normally remain silent, so how can I expect anyone to bother listening when I respond in more than one word answers?  I doubt anyone would understand what I try to tell them anyway.  I notice another pattern, another cycle in my life.  Perhaps this is why I often talk about events, conversations, or my own thoughts in my writings:  to remember them and what I say, because no one else will.