My parents are beginning to worry about the number of boxes that arrive daily at our humble home, like I knew they would.  The ill-fated jokes of me "being a crack dealer and these are my supplies" are not working well anymore, and they wonder where I am getting all this money from to pay for such things.  They do not realize(?) that I have a higher salary at this internship than my mother does during a year of teaching.  Actually, I have spent very little on music compared to what I have put into a savings account.  My father thinks that I have enough records, cannot see that I cannot stop, let the music in which I crave and need so much slip by my fingers.  At the rate I buy music, it will take me quite some time to finish listening to the records I purchased last month.  And by that point I'll have an array of new ones to listen to.  An endless loop of listening pleasure, all dedicated to increasing my pretensiousness (which I do not want but seem unable to shake off well) and knowledge of music in general. Yesterday night I watched an hour of this show on MTV called "Undressed."  It has to be the worst show in the world, but it's imperatively attracting in it's stupid way.  It made me happy that I stopped watching television along time ago, and yet I enjoyed it.  Of course, my brain felt like tapioca pudding last night, so pretty much anything would seem enjoyable in an odd, distracting sort of way, to draw my mind off of the perpetual insanity brewing. I am thinking about university beginning again, and as pleasing as it sounds to get away from this house, I am worried over the scholastic aspect, as I do every year.  I am starting to care less about doing well, which is both bad and good.  It releases me from a curse, but puts new pressures on me to maintain the gpa I have developed thus far.  Problems lead to more problems.  A never ending cycle of disparity. I am leaving for Las Vegas this Saturday for a week.  It will not be relaxing, amusing, or interesting, my parents are coming.  I am now going to Las Vegas for the sole purpose of babysitting my aunt's children while my parents and aunt+uncle go to various casino shows and things like that during the night.  Vacation.  What a joke.