From a night with Sara, I guess it was a good night.  We walked around outside.  I've done it so many other times, yet it was refreshing once again for me.  I hadn't been there in a while, and had forgotten the appearance, etc.  It was actually fun.  But now, I feel utterly alone and completely helpless.  Feeling so lonely it's almost insane, after I've been talking to someone continuously for three hours, and yet still craving more.  I guess I wanted something to happen, but nothing did.  She's known that I liked her for a while now.  I told her when I was drunk that one night...i feel so stupid...why was I even online that night?  Couldn't I have been in some other  place where I didn't have the ability to tell her that?  It probably had to come off as the most insincere thing...when it should have been meaningful, not some intoxicated comment.  I'm hoping I'll see more of her over the summer, even if it is to just talk.  I enjoy time with her it seems.  I'm not feeling lonely anymore.  Well, sort of, but maybe on a different level, one I'm more used to, where it's universal, not really aimed at anyone imparticular.  Before I wanted to be just with her.  Now it's more of anyone, but not really.  ugh, emotions are terrible to me.