| 11:38 am. i had a
dream last night, where i was in a mega man x game for some reason.
i was running around giant
post-apocalyptic factories/warehouses/plants when i spotted a small opening in a wall. after crawling through this hole, i could see rows of these factories, all shimmering in their odd mechanical beauty. it was quite wonderful. then, out of nowhere, this girl entered the same room. for some odd reason we began talking. i asked her where she was from, and she said japan. which was odd because she looked very european to me and not at all asian. the girl had dark brown/black hair that was relatively short (ie chin-length or so) and she was a few inches shorter than me. i don't recall what she was wearing, but she wasn't nude (i don't have those dreams that often). most likely nothing out of the ordinary, jeans and a tshirt maybe? we talked for a bit more, which was enjoyably odd, and then she simply vanished or walked off, i can't recall which. like any lonely boy, i was very saddened at her leaving and wanted to find her again. so i tried, but as my mind would concoct, i couldn't. so i just kept doing whatever it was i was doing in this megaman x game, running around, exploring places, etc. somehow, i walked into a room, and there she was. needless to say i was very happy at that moment, and surprisingly, so was she. although i recollect her being a bit more stoic than myself, which is very difficult to do, and very stoic (if you have ever seen/been with me). we began talking and all that other fun stuff again, discussing literature, music, how much we hate thomas pynchon, overall having a ripe old time. then i woke up to go to class. needless to say, it was one of those times where i wish i would have never woken up. my dream life was much more fulfilling than what was occurring in the real world. i felt like crying, i could have cried had i wanted to. those dreams are always painful, even though i've only had a few of them that i can recall. but still, the impression lasts, and i spend all day just looking at everyone in my classes to see if they influenced that dream or were the girl in that dream. but it never is. i'll just wind up in the future looking at old factories in a megaman x game by myself. well, that's my dream and it's interpretation of sorts. hope i have another one just like it tonight, so i can feel this same way tomorrow. but i probably won't even get the satisfaction of having a fulfilling fantasy life. <sob sob> |