yesterday night, i spent a half hour praying to God to let me die in my sleep so that i just wouldn't have to put up with my let-down of a life anymore. this can't be healthy, i figure. the amusing part is, i'm skeptical as to whether or not there is a God at all. i'm agnostic...i don't have enough of a spine to make a defined statement such as "yes there is one" or "no there isn't," so i choose the middle path. it's not really a surprise, then, that i did not die in my sleep. it gets dark here so quickly these days. one moment i'll be starting at my computer screen with daylight strongly behind me and the next the glare will be gone, and everything will be sort of a black color, a pasty nothingness which didn't seem to take much effort to shroud everything in. i get frustrated with this. i don't mind daylight at all, and i don't mind darkness at all, either. i just think there should be more of a balance, or at least a transition...